Post-90s girls: I won't agree to men who often chat with me, for two reasons

01

Would a girl like a guy who often chats with her?

I don’t know if any of you have had this experience:

When a person of the opposite sex who is not disgusted by himself, say good morning and night to us every day, share his daily life, and patiently listen to our troubles and take care of our little emotions. Comfort you when you are sad, accompany you when you are insomnia, no matter when you look for him, you will always be able to reply to your messages in seconds. Like a 24-hour online customer service, always on call.

How would you feel if you met such a person?

Maybe at first, we don’t have much feeling.

But gradually, with the passage of time, we gradually got used to the company of this person, and even began to expect him to send messages to ourselves.

They will lose their minds because they didn’t wait for their “good morning”, and they will sleep all night because their “good night” didn’t arrive as scheduled.

At a certain moment, did you think you fell in love with the other person?

In fact, it is not love at all, just a habit.

Psychology defines it as emotional dependence. When one party continues to receive spiritual comfort from the other party, it will become addicted to this experience, resulting in psychological dependence.

This dependence stems primarily from a need to seek security and to be loved.

Therefore, we often find that those who are easy to take the lead in chatting, mistake this kind of love illusion for love, and have a good impression of those who chat with them for a long time are often those who lack a sense of security, desire to be affirmed, and need to be recognized by others. A person who acquires a sense of presence and value in him.

Many boys also often fall into the misunderstanding that “a girl will fall in love with a boy who chats with her”.

Therefore, in the process of pursuing girls, I always find girls to chat with. Talking and asking, thinking that this way, the other party will be able to chat from a female friend to a girlfriend.

There is no denying that the opportunity for success exists. But not for all girls.

Take a few post-90s female friends around me as an example, they all have the same idea: they won’t agree to men who often talk to them.

02

There are two main reasons:

First: You will feel that this man has nothing to do all day and is not worth relying on.

Someone once said that companionship is the longest confession of love.

Some people say that the man who responds to your message in seconds must love you very much, because he is reluctant to make you wait too long.

Therefore, many girls take this sentence as a criterion for measuring the sincerity of a man: no matter day or night, a man who can take the initiative to chat with himself and reply every second must be a good man to rely on; and those who can’t say a word or two for a long time Yes, he is definitely a scumbag, he deserves to be single.

There are some men, either out of instinct or believing this nonsense.

When they are in love, they often have nothing to talk to, and frequently send messages to each other: “Good morning”, “Good night”, “Have you eaten”, “Did you sleep?” Tell each other the same.

Some girls like this very much and feel that they are surrounded by love, so they fall in love quickly.

For other girls, she was not impressed.

She will only think: This person is too boring, right? If you do n’t even have a serious job , how can it be worth entrusting for life?

Just imagine, which man with a successful career will hold his mobile phone and fall in love with you every day when he has nothing to do, and he has to wonder when you will send a message and guarantee a speed of light reply?

Take ourselves as an example, sometimes we are so busy with work that we don’t even have time to drink water or go to the bathroom, let alone check our mobile phones.

What a woman wants has never been the tenderness that you accomplish nothing, and the sincerity that is impoverished.

What really attracts them is the kind of man who is self-motivated, professional, and at the same time cares about himself.

So even if you are busy with work and ignore her temporarily, she is embarrassed to disturb you. Because you are too good, she doesn’t deserve it.

Where else would you care how long you delayed her reply, such a trivial thing that makes you especially cheap.

The love of adults should not only stay in the spiritual level of romantic love, but to understand that without material foundation, all feelings are empty talk.

It’s superficial, but realistic.

03

Second: I will think this man is too clingy.

I don’t know since when, a word has become popular on the Internet: little milk dog.

Refers to those dog-licking boyfriends who are begging for kisses and hugs all day long, and always revolving around their girlfriends.

For those girls who are also clingy about love, this kind of boy like a little milk dog is very popular.

But some relatively independent girls said they could not accept it.

They believe that love is only a part of life and should not be the whole of life.

In addition to love, life should also have work, family, friends, and a personal space of your own.

Of course, they don’t reject boys who know how to be clingy properly, but they really don’t like a boy who has to cling to them all the time.

That is to say, when it’s time to fall in love, we stick to each other, and we can be as tired as we want; when it’s time for work, we respect each other and don’t disturb each other easily.

If a boy is always bombarded with 24-hour information regardless of the occasion and time. Not only does it make girls feel that he is boring, but also that such boys are too clingy and stay away.

Just imagine, when you are still busy with your work and working overtime, he sends more than a dozen irrelevant messages, “What are you doing?” “Why didn’t you reply to me?” “Why didn’t you reply to my messages? “

Do you feel the happiness of being needed?

Most people just feel suffocated, right?

Girls looking for a boyfriend are looking for a leader who is mature in thought, stable in behavior, and can point the way for themselves in work and life.

It’s not a love “brain fan” who thinks love is bigger than the sky.

04

In the past, people always said: How difficult can it be to chase girls?

Just keep talking, keep talking, and when she is willing to share her joys, sorrows and joys with you, it will be done.

However, the reality is that if you keep talking all over your head, the other party doesn’t even care about you.

Today’s girls, you are no longer just chatting, and you can easily deceive them with a few sweet words.

It is better to spend more time working hard and trying to change yourself instead of trying your best to find topics and chat like a dog.

Only by making yourself better can the other person take you seriously.

She takes you seriously, and it doesn’t matter if we talk or not.